Trained Monkey

I just saw some noob on the news while I was walking through the lounge and it made me angry. Keep in mind I only saw like 5 seconds of this, so I know pretty much nothing about anything.

Anyway, some guy was fundraising to raise awareness about the dangers of train tracks or something stupid. He was real over the top about it, like "Oh my god! This is one of the biggest issues to ever hit the youth of today!". I don't know why he was doing it... Whether one of his kids died in a train accident or something - who knows - but whatever reason, it's crap. What a waste of time and resources. I mean, honestly, how many people die by getting hit by trains each year? Like 5? Let alone kids... And then the news appeared to be putting a positive spin on it like he's some hero or something. Like "Far out! This guys trying to save FIVE people from dying annually! And he's using the time and money of other people to do it! What a legend." Sif you could even save those 5 people. Pretty much anyone who dies by getting hit by a train is an idiot. I don't understand why he wouldn't raise money for something that actually matters, and is actually killing people for avoidable reasons, like HIV or something. Honestly, what a nubcake.

For some reason spell check didn't have a problem with nubcake being a word? Wow. 1337 speak is becoming mainstream!

Anywho. Rant over. Go get some cigarettes as a celebration.

Tyler Jacobs

I haven't written a blog in like 150 millenia. Insane. I'm only writing one now cause I'm at home on a Saturday night due to extreme sickness. If it weren't for this crap flu thing I wouldn't be writing anything in this noob blog... I've kind of gone off it lately. Just can't be bothered with it. The lack of comments doesn't really help I guess. My blogs average like 2 non-me comments or less (no this isn't me trying to make you all comment more).

Anyway I don't actually know what I came here to write. I s'pose I'll just ramble on about the going-ons of my life and in my head...

First of all, this uber sickness. I think it's like a cross between a really really bad cold, an uber migrane and the black plague. It's literally like there's a demon inside of me stabbing tiny needles into every part of me he can, plus some big ones in my head and throat, and then stealing all my heat to make the fire on his tail bigger. I try to cough him up but he just sends his mucus allies instead. What a dickhead. I hate him. My mum said if he wasn't gone on Monday we'd get him exorcised by the man in the white coat.
Even worse than all of that though, is the fact that my social life since Tuesday has consisted of Nick Gill coming over for like 20 minutes cause his soccer practice got cancelled. What's the bet that tonight is the night that someone has some insanely awesome party where all the hottest celebs turn up - Suzy Cato, Ryan Stiles, Colin Mochery, Al Gore, the on-fire guy from that old Rexona ad... It hurts just thinking about what I could be missing. What if they have lots of yoghurt? Or even worse - lots of passionfruit yoghurt! Oh my god, I think I'm going to kill myself - what if they have a giant 50,000 litre bowl of it, and it's full of Keira Knightley clones? Ok Rowan, calm down. Just breathe. They could be having a crap night too. They might all be sitting at home on their own, watching some crappy Saturday night movie... And their Keira Knightley clones are rubbing their feet...Wait. What the hell?! This ends now.

Next topic of conversation. Something a little more... intense. I've been thinking heaps about like the darker side to humanity. Like in this book I read a while ago, the author (whose name I can't remember, nor the name of the book) mentioned that humans need to have the freedom and ability to bring down their lives at any moment. He didn't really mention many details as to why, but I would guess that it gives us a larger sense of freedom. Like being able to rebel against the things that control us in our day to day lives. I guess it would bring a sense of satisfaction too. I know when I was depressed there was always something so weirdly satisfying about watching myself crumble to pieces. And I constantly had thoughts about blowing up in public - I still do. Going psycho and yelling and screaming, hitting people (Anton ALWAYS gets hit lol), and just generally creating chaos. Sometimes I vomit everywhere too, just cause that's hilarious. Anyway I don't really know where I'm going this. Back to the darker side of things I guess...

Another thing I was thinking is how you can't have light without darkness. Well, no, that's not completely true, but light without darkness would just be constant light, so you wouldn't really notice it. That's a pretty obvious thing to say, but has pretty huge implications if you apply it in certain places. Here's a quote which explains things reasonably:

"Without access to true chaos, we'll never have true peace. Unless everything can get worse, it won't get any better" - Chuck Palahnuik

And you can apply that to any dualism pretty much. You can't have good tastes without bad (or worse) tastes. You can't have good looking people without ugly/uglier looking people. You can't have hot weather without cold/colder weather. You get the point. What that means is that all the bad stuff in this world is necessary, and conversely, not technically bad. If it's not happening close to home then bad stuff makes us feel better (a lot of the time). We all have this desire to see bad things, not to deal with them ourselves (though I wonder whether we might), but to watch them from a distance. Cliche question, but why do you think the news is so full of tragedy and chaos? It's because we enjoy it, we buy it. Why do you think we all love watching shows full of drama, like soap operas? Because, true to the name, they're full of drama and we enjoy that. Some people say it's sadistic that we like to watch pain and suffering so much, but I don't think it has anything to do with sadism, but something quite different. I think it helps us to be comfortable with our own lives and to enjoy them more.
It all makes me question the whole idea of heaven. No pain, no sadness, only love, happiness and fun. When you think about it it's a completely flawed concept. How can happiness exist without sadness? Like I said before, it's a dualism. One must exist in order for the other to exist. Without any of the bad stuff heaven would just be bland.
Basically, what I wanna say is, it's the fact that our world is flawed - that we as people are flawed that makes life beautiful. I'm starting to dislike idealists more and more because they try and make everything fair, when in reality unfairness is just a fact of life which should be embraced. It's NEVER going to go away. I say take life as it comes and don't try to mould things to some preconceived notion of how they should be. That's not to say sit down and do nothing when you get hit with something crap.. Just don't constantly try and iron out every tiny wrinkle just so you can try and reach your idea of a perfect life. It's the unfairness, unpredictability and crapness of life that makes it fun. I could rant about life for a bit more, but I won't.
None of the above is based on any real evidence by the way.. Just my thoughts.

I have a plane to catch!